Chapter 7

With Fred’s help, they were back in the ER in under five minutes. Passing the desk, Mel waved to Jane. Jane rolled her eyes and nodded towards the waiting area. There it seems that the crowd has tripled in size. Shaking her head Mel promptly brought the stretcher back to the Trauma room, immediately noting an extra person there too. Smiling to the familiar looking petite brunette, she parked the stretcher and locked the breaks.

The woman ran up to the stretcher and gave Jon a quick kiss. “Are you OK baby?” she asked.

Jon’s free arm immediately went up to hug her. “Yeah baby, the Humpty Dumpty is broken again.” he laughed. “But Mel and Fred here are doing their best to put me back together again.”

Turning slightly he made the introductions. “Mel, this is my wife Dorothea! Dottie, this is my nurse Melody.”

Mel smiled and shook Dorothea’s offered hand “Nice to meet you Mrs. Bongiovi!”

“Please call me Dottie! And I hope these three overgrown babies haven’t caused you any problems.”

“Hey, we’ve been on our best behavior here!” came Richie’s voice from behind her.

“Aha, and the hell is freezing over Sambora!” snorted Dorothea. “The three of you behaving, then I’m the Queen of England!”

“At your service Your Majesty!” Said Richie with a fake British accent and bowed to Dorothea, earning himself a punch on his bicep in the process.

“OUCH!!!” he screamed.

“Mel, I think you just got yourself another patient!” Richie moaned dramatically holding his injured arm.

Melody glanced his way. “You want me to admit you for overnight observation?”

“Yes please! I think I need very close observation and intensive nursing care!” He moaned again.

Melody snorted and moved over to the computer. She punched a few random keys, then turned to Richie.

“It seems like you’re in luck! We have two beds available! One in pediatric unit and another in the locked psych unit! Your choice!”

“Oh I think he needs the psychiatric bed!” chuckled David “Just make sure that the room is padded!”

“Aha, and the pediatric one is perfect for you!” snorted Dorothea.

“But I won’t fit into a pediatric bed!” whined David and pouted.

Melody could not hold back laughter. Shaking her head she turned to Dorothea “How do you deal with this circus for so many years?”

“I treat them like the spoiled children that they are: lots of spanking!”

“Well, for some of us that might be an incentive.” came a quiet mumble from the stretcher.

“What was that dear?” Dorothea raised an eyebrow at her husband.

“Nothing, my love!” he said, and quickly followed that with a smile.

“Right” snorted his wife.

“So, how is that arm?” asked Melody, turning her attention back to Richie.

“It’s a tiny bit better.” He said with a serious face. “Maybe I’ll be able to recover with just some home care after all”

“Sure thing! Lets see if I can make some arrangements.” Mel said with an evil smile and turned to Fred. “Hey Fred, you wanna pick up some private duty hours?”

“Nah Mel, you know I can’t risk Scott’s wrath. If he finds out I went to a rock star’s home, he’ll leave me! He is such a jealous bitch!” Fred dead panned with a straight face.

The look on Richie’s face was priceless.

Suddenly, a loud snort came from the stretcher “I think we all forgot who the is the REAL patient here!”

“Sure! Go ahead, take care of him! I’ll just suffer in silence…as always…upstaged by the front man…such is my fate as the side kick guitar player…” grumbled Richie.

“Aha, poor you! I’ll have Dean give you an adjustment before the next gig! Well, if he has any time left after adjusting me and David…that is!”

“Thanks, I think I’ll pass.” Came Richie’s reply.

“Suit yourself, asshole!” snorted Jon and shot him a “one finger salute”.

Melody raised an eyebrow at Dorothea, who just rolled her eyes and shook her head.

Smiling at the older woman, Mel said “ How unprofessional of me would it be to say that I keep waiting for cameras to show up and some obnoxious TV host to yell “SMILE! YOU’RE ON CANDID CAMERA!”

Dorothea laughed and came over to give Mel a hug.

“Sorry hun, this is real! And you’re stuck here with these Three Stooges! But I promise I’ll help you to keep them in line!”

“OK, but I’m still gonna go and check the circuit board for any Nitrous Oxide leaks!” whispered Mel

“Well, you do that hun, if it’ll make you feel better.” laughed Dorothea.